I just love ballet. I want to be skinny enough to do it or muscular enough. I want to be a ballerina. I just really want it, but let’s be honest. I’m never EVER going to be any of those things.
today I traveled from Philly to NYC with a really good friend of mine to see American ballet theater’s Don Quixoite. What an eventful and fun day. I just need to sleep and then I will blog tommrow.
snapbacksntemptatts: To all yall triflin and sayin not to download the song all I have to say is *Beyoncé voice* I’m a growwwwwwwn woman. I can do what eva I wanna.”
I would just like for my thoughts at night to become creepy, and filled w/ self hatred.
I've been accepted.
I failed my modern 1 class. I’ve come to realize that maybe my teachers hate me. However, I don’t give a fuck. I struggle in modern however, I won’t for long. I’m just convinced that I need to go really hard in ballet. Most of my classmates who do really well in modern all have a great deal of ballet technique. I’m not here to impress anyone however, my grades are...
I'm so grateful.
I have amazing people in my life who notice me and appreciate me.
I just tell you how much I’m in love with you. How it hurts me that you hate me. How it feels to know that we will never be friends again.
who would've known.
This past year, I’ve made myself seemingly disshelved as I tried so hard to pretend like i have it together. I’m clearly a mess, a wreckage it’s not heart shaped.
too many people. I’ve had my hearbroken. I have no friends. I make men hate me. I’m stupid. I literallly cannot do anything right and i’m drinking a beer and having an allergic reaction. oh well. idc. i’m so stupid.
My best friend texted me, he asked if I looked...
jasminehun: omg this is so asdfghjkl;
Disney College Program
I’ve been accepted yada..yada..yada.. I’m from Philly, temple U. Question tho, this may sound extremely funny but like where can I get a haircut near/around disney? I have ethnic hair, so I can’t let it grow or I might belong in animal kindgom.
im so stupid. wine and antibiotics till im unconcious.
kiss me. tell i’m special. I’m beautiful. I’m cute. I have everything you want. do all of that please.
I'm literally tired
I hung out with one of my closest friend and her family this past weekend, they literally were so accepting and extremely nice. I couldn’t get past how sweet they were. Her grandma was a angel. great weekend. I couldn’t help but wish that family was so accepting. Twas great to be out and about with them.
I can see how someone would contemplate suicide, I’m not feeling suicidal at this moment. I haven’t felt it before. I just see the ideal in it. I feel like shit. I’VE NEVER felt this type of pain before. It’s all self inflicted. I literally could die right now at this moment, and be okay with it. I don’t wanna die, and I know it’s more to life. I just wish...
these feelings I have are new.. yet reminiscent to an old cut. Tore each and every time my heart decides to fall for you. I’ve been pacing back and forth all week, uneasy steps, my heart literally was racing. I wish I was fearless just like you. I also wish I was private like you. I wish I could deal well with my emotions without wearing them on my sleeve. It’s not okay, it’s...
wonder what it feels like to have a guy like you back. I never had a boyfriend nor have I been on a date. Loser doeee.
I’m so embarrassed. you are the only person that I want to see. the only person that I’d lOVE to see right now. It’s kiling me.
aren’t my friends. You never what like what you see. You put your hood on your head, and you walk past with your head down because you feel and hope that nobody sees you. You slowly die inside everyday because you feel ugly.
facebook makes me depressed. I also realized as to why I don’t like mirrors. I went to h&m today, I looked fat. My skin looked horrible and dry, and discolored and just all around shitty. My face looked prickly, and my cyst just sat on my skin. I’m tired of feeeeling ugly. I’m tired.
the strange ass weeek, I had before. My spring break was actually quite normal. I don’t know if it has anything to do with me but my family actually was nice to me. I got things done, I actually feel PRETTY good right now. This is rare. I’m praying that my upcoming week is stress free. I don’t worry so much. I just get things done, and that god watches over.
sometimes when I’m between that stage of sleep and awake , I get these serious sessions where my thought lines just blur and manifest. I often think about religion, sexuality, love and religion. I’ve never been the type of person to feel guilty for being gay, since I was younger I’ve had this inkling that I like men. I liked boys, like boys and i’m sure I will. I’ve...
Every mouth you’ve ever kissed was just practice. All the bodies you’ve ever...– Warsan Shire (via thelindenbuzz)
I don't feel
good enough for you. you are worth something more than I can give you. You’re more than what I am. I’m nothing I can provide to you. I FEEEL LIKE SHIT TONIGHT.
tattoo your name across my heart. my teenage years run rampant of stupid decisions and sweaty palms. how do I look?
you will love.
me. It makes to me happy to know that I man that I love is gonna love me back one day. I’m gonna feel normal. He’s gonna kiss me and I’m gonna melt. I’m gonna feel normal